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You’ll stand by her side and help her spark a conversation with whichever hot single strikes her fancy. Your friend struggles with talking to new people, and, as her friend, of course you want to help her out.

But if she doesn’t ask you to help her flirt (i.e., to be her wingwoman), you probably shouldn’t suggest it.

(ANYTHING to get the conversation started, from “What’s the score? Be VERY decisive in your language (“I’m gonna head home…have a good night, guys! If you think the guy is sketchy, if you’re worried that she’s had too much to drink, stay and look out for her. A good wingwoman will be easily reached for text message updates, and available for brunch or coffee the next day to discuss the entire thing, going over every little detail, FOR AS LONG AS SHE WANTS TO.

I’ve never gotten into them, but Melissa is always trying to get me to listen to them.

“Some people don’t want you to just randomly go up to guys [or girls] for them,” Baxter says.

“Also, some people aren’t good at taking advice on how they’re flirting, etc.

The perfect wing relationship between two single women is one in which both parties have completely opposite taste in men. You wanna see if this thing is gonna sink or float as soon as possible, or move on, so take a bathroom break and give the conversation a chance to breathe without you.

If one girl likes mountain men and the other likes preps? If both parties like broody hipsters, then you’re forced to go through a really awkward back-and-forth of “Oh…can have him…” “No, no, you go ahead…” YOU know how awesome and funny and cool your friend is, but there’s a chance she’s not so sure about it when faced with the daunting task of talking to/approaching men. You are her Coach and she is going to go out there and WIN THE GAME of meeting someone tonight! If they’re still talking when you get back, and if neither look especially relieved upon your return, you’re looking good; if not, move on. Be friendly and keep him occupied while giving your friend a chance to talk to her quarry uninterrupted.

Knowing What Your Friend Wants Talking in a Group Knowing When to Leave Community Q&A A good wingwoman knows how to highlight her friend’s best qualities to get them talking with some new interesting new people in social settings.

While your wingwoman doesn’t have to be married, she should be in a healthy relationship, says matchmaker Talia Goldstein, co-founder of the dating site Three Day

Not only will her relationship status dissolve any hint of competition, she also knows what to look for in a guy.

The more confident you can get her to feel about herself, the less work you’ll have to do later in the night. So, the guy has an annoying/not cute/chatty friend. Part of being a good wingwoman is knowing when to bow out.

People are usually more shy when it comes to starting a conversation with someone they’re interested in, so check your pride at the door and be the first to talk to the guy in question, so that your friend doesn’t have to. As soon as you see that the conversation is tripping along successfully without your help (and you’ve tested this with at least two bathroom breaks), stretch your arms, yawn, and announce that you’re calling it a night. ”, it might be sort of awkward for her to have to say “Uh, I guess…I dunno….” if she’s shy.) The absolute most important thing you can do as a wingwoman, friend, and decent human being, is look out for your friend’s well-being.

“You should wait to be asked,” says Susan Baxter, president of Hire a Wing Woman, a Boston-based wingwoman-and dating-coach-hiring service for men and women.

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